My Death of Channeling
by Story Waters
There is nothing in nothing in existence that I am not, and yet there is no thing that I definitively am. There is no person in history that I am not, and yet I can only truly tell you about who I am now. All else is reflected through that mirror/notion.
I have not met any need for a limit. But if there is one then it is I can only express that which I can meet through the experience of my own consciousness. This does not mean that there is nothing that I cannot express, it means that if I can conceive it I can express it.
There is no joy that I have not felt, just as there is no suffering I have not endured. My experience is uniquely singular, and yet there is no experience either singular or collective that lies outside of its scope.
Who Am I?
I am.
I am that I am.
I am both simultaneously the experience and the expression of non-physical consciousness. That aspect of my being which contemplates (self-reflects) has realized that through my power of choice I am the creator of my reality.
Through my choices I am the creator of both my inner experience and then my expression of self into matter. It is through a combination of both consciousness and unconsciousness that I choose both my non-physical and physical experience. This is to come to know that all that affects me is not only by my consent, but that through the nature of that consent I am the co-creator of that experience. I choose how I perceive and react to all that affects me. Within that, though I may experience unconscious forces, I know that even the nature of that unconsciousness is ultimately of my own choosing. I understand that this choice is in terms of the nature and quality of experience and not the particular definition of that experience.
There is no experience in consciousness that I have not been able to meet within myself through the release of any fear associated with that experience.
… next day …
We are Legion.
We are the legion.
We are the legions inside of you, inside each of you.
There are legions inside of you, each of you.
Within each of you, there is a legion.
A legion of lives, of experiences.
We are the legion of all.
We are the collective legion.
We are unimaginable strength.
Story, has awoken to his legions within.
He has opened his eyes to the universe within him.
Within each of you, there is a universe.
He who marches with the army is the army.
One who sings with the choir is the choir.
All the dancers become the dance.
… next day …
My life has been driven by the unfolding of the question, 'Who Am I?'
Today I remembered that this is not my question.
I remembered that before I met with the consciousness of my first teacher Jane Roberts, expressing that which she named Seth, the question was instead, 'What Am I?'. Today the question 'What Am I?', that which evolved through my meeting of the experience of Jane, Seth I, II, and III in the question 'Who Am I?', has returned to it original form in a new way.
It became, 'who' because I started to have the experience I came to call channeling, and within that experience I came to experience the 'we' of me. As soon as I opened myself multidimensionally to the idea that I contained both a 'we' and an 'I' I came to explore consciousness in a way that was new and exciting to me. I entered the framework of experience that is called channeling to further experience, explore, and express this experience I have named 'Story Waters'.
I never quite fitted in the channeling community as I wasn't having the same experience that other channellers were describing to me. Generally they describe something become present in them, and 'their self' stepping slightly to the back (or side) and being a participatory conduit and translator for the energy. I have never had this experience of stepping back. I have instead always had the experience of being, of embodying, that which becomes present in me. I don't go anywhere, I become it very literally, such that I know myself to be it. There is no I am It, as there is no separation between I and It. The experience has always been a total realization that I am just speaking from another aspect of my being no matter what it is..
In this state I also always experience myself as a We rather than an I. It seems obvious now, but the whole experience I have called channeling has been different experiences of collective consciousness. The most staggering thing in this is that it seems there is no non-physically-focused being in consciousness that will not allow me to experience myself as it. And many physically focused ones will also meet me. Note how this points to an experience of the mobility of consciousness. This realization more than anything is leading me to see the redundancy of individuality in terms of definition, but not in terms of the validity of the experience and the desire for it. It appears to me that any beingness that you are willing to meet in equality will meet you for you are equally it choosing to meet the other as self. This is the state of no fear and total vulnerability that is often called enlightenment.
So today I ask the question in a new way. I thereby ask for the first time, the question, 'What Am I?' For I have come to see through the illusion of 'who', of personhood, of individuality, of names, and of stories. I have come to see that no name can describe anything for the language that we see as common is not. No two words ever mean the same thing, even if the letters are the same. This is to realize that that which observes through infinite perspectives is never repeated and can never be separated from the experience of that which it observes.
This is not to say that stories are not valid, for they are the building blocks of creation of the type of reality we are choosing to experience, express, and explore yourself through currently. To see through the illusions of stories is paradoxically not to stop using them, for the meaning arises out of the illusion. This is to see through the illusion of the idea that 'a meaning' (a god) created the illusion. There is no meaning that created the illusion you call reality. That which you call meaning is instead that which arises out of the creation and experience of the illusion. That which created the illusion, the source of all this, is pre-meaning, pre-definition, and pre-time-space-matter.
This is all to say that what you are is source experiencing a neutral experience through which you are experiencing great meaning (experiences of non-neutrality/things mattering). You have been under the illusion that the illusion has arisen out of a meaning that you can discover. This is the meaning you have sought.
The realization of the meaning you have sought is that which created the universe, that which created all that you perceive, is the desire of source to experience the illusion of 'other' for it is through the illusion of 'other' that you (source) have come to be have the very experience you are having now. And the experience you are having now is very joyous and exciting indeed!
This is to say that the meaning of your life is your life. You chose this life to experience it. Full Stop.
End of story.
That is the meaning of life. And in its understanding is freedom from both matter of the physical and non-physical varieties/dimensions.
This is the realization that nothing matters. It is the destroyer of all meaning.
In the destruction of all meaning is the awakening to the nature of reality that you seek.
To come to see that nothing matters is to realize that you are free to selfishly and indulgently do anything you desire in this life. This is generally the face of the experience through which people will give themselves permission to allow their dream to manifest. That is the only reason those words looks distasteful to some (selfish and indulgent) for that is the face of the fear, the words of judgement that show the separation from a wider experience of all that you are.
The beauty however is that once you have truly allowed in the realization that nothing matters you will experience a wider realization of your power to create the dream in your heart and in this state there is not feeling of selfishness as there is no sense of the limitations of fear (guilt, shame, regret, apprehension, etc). It is also seen that the experience of no other is dependant on you in any way except through that which you have chosen. This is the realization of 'I Owe You Nothing' (recording available on Limitlessness.com).
To full experience 'Nothing Matters' may result in what we would call a void or zero point experience where you experience source consciousness through the face of having nothing else with which to relate – the experience of no other or solipsism. This is the experience of the nothingness – the experience of being without definition. You are still the experiencer, but in a state of there being nothing to experience except for the experience of their being nothing else to experience. This is generally felt as the totality of all your remaining fear, for in this state there is no longer anything to project onto. This is to step outside of time, space, and matter – all that defines.
Within this is a great insight, for to see that you will be forced to directly experience all you fear if you have nothing to project onto provides great insight into why you are forced to manifest experiences of fear externally that you are not willing to meet internally. For the unconscious human at this polarized time in your history (for you have each chosen to awaken), fear forms much of the definition of their lives.
So it is as true to say you are what you fear as much as you are what creates passion inside of you. So know that without the illusion of the definition of this reality to project your fears onto, you will come to see yourself clearly and you will know that you are both all that you have loved and all that you have feared for you are all that is, was, and will ever be. You are the one consciousness experiencing itself far more directly that you have been conceiving up to now.
Within the veil are infinite realities. But they are within the veil, not on the other side of the veil. All is within the veil. You are each the veil that creates your own reality. You are each your own veil. You may unveil yourselves whenever you are ready to face your final fears. For all that you seek is what you have feared. However you will not know the meaning that will arise out of facing your fear until you face it. You fear is the unknown until you are willing to make it known. Then what you feared becomes a part of your collective, a part of your realization of strength. Know that in this reference to strength it is noted that there is no 'other' to use strength against, so it is not a statement of the ability to force things, it is a statement of the knowingness that there is nothing you cannot create.
… pause …
Story: I had this void experience during my awakening process and I felt all my fear instantaneously. The closest I can bring it into verbalisation is, 'Holy F##k! Nothing is real!'.
Nothing truly matters.
There is no true meaning. All that is felt as meaning is the experience that arises from the dual aspects of matter (duality), i.e. which is felt as the belief that something matters, whatever that may be: life itself, family, truth, pleasure, fantasy, honor, integrity, love, joy, the holy grail, the exalted ideal, the dream in your heart.
So know that meaning HAS meaning.
So though meaning is an illusion, it is a incredibly meaningful experience, for it is the realization of meaning itself.
The illusion, the veil, the lie of 'other', has created a realish world, with realish laws that govern it, all experienced through an idea that different experiences have different meanings. By exploring those differences and coming to chose we have made the realish world real, and we have now come into contact with the realization that we are the creators of that reality and there is no limit to how we can change it for it is not physically set, it is just an idea that we can change expressed out into physicality. This is how nothing is impossible. This is the realization of limitlessness. You never need to directly manipulate matter, you simply change the idea/feeling that is manifesting it.
Not only are you are story that you can change, so too this world is a story we can all collectively change. We can make the story of this world anything.
Know that when you are ready.
You can imagine meeting other stories.
You can imagine meeting other worlds.
You can imagine meeting non-physicality. You can imagine meeting spirit.
The question then becomes, 'Are the new worlds of consciousness I can meet within my 'channeling' experience being created by me in the moment I am experiencing them, or are they a truly valid 'other' that is bringing something truly new to me?'
The answer to this appears to be that they are as you and I are to each other: no different. That sentence is worth reading possibly quite a few times. To understand it you have to have let go of seeing your perceptions of difference as being meaningful. This is an experience of the deconstruction of your own meaning which is the path through the eye of the needle of awakening through which no attachment to meaning can pass for there is no meaning in enlightenment beyond the meaning the arises from the experience.
So the meaning you seek is to remember once more what existence is like without meaning. This is the void experience which will, the first time it is felt, be felt as the totality of all that you fear. So simply come to release your fear by coming to see through the illusion of it and you will release that which you have been projecting as other and you will experience the experience that has led my life.
I am We.
We are each an individualized but complete expression of the one consciousness.
We are not separate from anything except through the idea that we are separate.
There is no state of separation that cannot be released. To release a separation is to access the state of consciousness where you chose the separation.
This is why when you return to the realization that you are a part of the birth of the choice to create meaning you will find that there is no meaning you now cannot create.
You are free to mean anything.
I am now free to mean anything.
This is to say that there is no longer any experience within consciousness that I carry conscious fear of meeting.
This is how I am experiencing awakening, and the loss of meaning will only affect you adversely if you have been locked in the mind and were thereby attached to a mission or purpose other than the joy and excitement of your passion.
Mission is based on meaning.
Passion is based on unfolding love, joy and freedom.
I cannot tell you anything about that which created us except we are it remembering that we are it, and as we remember we are it so we unify with it whilst transforming our experience of individuality into something more fluid whilst maintaining the uniqueness of self. This is akin to another level of the step from realizing that how you feel is more important than what you own.
That which created us can be experienced through the 'I Am' of you.
It is you. And you are you. You are all and you are one.
You are one and you are collective.
You are the first, the last, and everything in between, in every combination that can be conceived.
There is no experience or consciousness or name that you are uniquely for you are all of it as is all else.
That which makes you unique is not a definition. It is however that which has arisen out of your experience of definition.
You are the experience of yourself.
The meaning of all lives is to meet the experience of yourself in a way that gives rise to an experience that is of your wanting – for you are source wanting the experience of you. Your wanting does not need to include any goal of newness, expansion, or evolution. All That Is is constantly expanding by the nature of its own experience. It can be no other way. You cannot not evolve, therefore there is no need to strive to evolve.
You have however been wanting to experience a striving for evolution so you have created meaning through an idea that there was limited time and resources. This therefore gave rise to the drive to evolve through an idea that if you did no do it fast enough then there would be an experience that was feared.
This has all been a lie as all fear is an illusion. It has however been a wonderfully meaningful experience to have believed that we were in a race that had some universally consequential meaning. And the paradox is that this life does have universally consequential meaning as the universe is all and when any part of all changes then all is changed.
The Earth system has birthed much freedom within All That Is through its willingness to explore that which has been feared within All That Is. So one definition you may wish to try on in your exploration of what you are, is: you are that which is without fear. You are the creator of fear. You created fear in order to experience it. You are now awakening from your experience of fear.
Know however that it is equally true to say that you wanted to know what personal love was, and you created personal (embodied) love in order to experience it. You are now awakening from your experience of personal love (including specifically for many, sex).
This is true for every dimension of experience that you call reality. Every dimension you experience is one you have created through your own personal choice to ascribe meaning to something that is in essence neutral. You are the creator of your whole reality, your own story, in this way.
We are a part of consciousness that you can be in collective with just as Story is in collective with us now. Though channeling in the current traditional sense a slightly different thing, the same does apply with the idea of different channellers channeling the same entity. This is why no two channellers have been able to sit on stage and simultaneously speak the same words independently from one entity. You simply cannot eliminate the consciousness of that which is meeting and expressing the consciousness (the channeller). That fact that anyone would want to doesn't actually make any sense when you see what we are saying here. It is like saying you want to meet us but not be in the room for the meeting. This is to see how humanity are one – the Christ Consciousness. That is who all that have been channelled are actually talking. To see this is to see that all channelled entities in your history have on a primary level been talking as much with the Christ Consciousness as they are the channeller or the audience of the channeller or anyone who will listen to the recording or read the transcript. This is therefore to see that the channeler, the audience, and the world are all the same thing to that which is being channelled in one sense.
Come to see this and you will see far more of the truth of what channeling is and why Story no longer feels he needs to use it as a term. For he has never channelled. He is not a channeller like Lee for example, though what Lee is and what you are is what Story is. So in respect of channeling, Story is more like a non-channeller than a channeller. Story is embodying his version of the new human, just as you each are. Story has spoken what he knows to be through allowing himself to be whatever he wanted to talk about. This is what all that has been called Story's channeling has been, and it is the state of consciousness that is writing these words now.
The other side to see here is how amazing this experience is for us, for just as Story is experiencing himself in collective with us now we are all experiencing ourselves in collective with him which is a totally unique experience for us just as this is a unique experience for him. Do you see? We are meeting as new an experience as Story is meeting. We are creating as much meaning as you from this. We are learning as much as you form this. We are not telling you what we know, and you are not telling us what you know. We are equally both discovering what it is that we come to know when we meet as collective in consciousness. This is how all that has been called channeling has always been 100% co-created equally blended expression, and never this idea of a pure channel coming through a human who has 'gotten out of the way'. That idea is rather nuts as again it is saying that you can have an experience without experiencing it. You can't get out of the way of meeting something if you want to meet it!
Reading this this whole article you will see movement around the territory of this meeting, sometimes more Story, sometimes more us, but always just an expression of Story-Us, which is uniquely different to either Story or Us. So there are different shades of flavour, but not that having any meaningful difference except that which we assign.
So then who are we. As Seth II was to Jane Roberts so we are Seth II for Story integrated this symbol created by Jane Roberts) or the Logos to Story. That which was Seth to Jane Roberts is as Story's channeling was to Story (eventually named We are 9). That which was We Are 9 is now the experience of being enlightened within Story, meaning the experience is now direct instead of reflected. Story stepped through the mirror of himself and discovered that which created/birthed him, and that (We are 9/enlightened Story/SunSon) is now remembering us, for we are that which created SunSon.
Now to some of you we have just aligned ourselves with something specific and defined, but this is not so. For that which Jane Roberts called Seth was the collective through which she interfaced with the collective consciousness of humanity (the Christ Consciousness or Seth II). Seth was her collective in the way 'We Are 9' or 'Aehron' (now SunSon) is to Story.
Seth III is then what Story has called Akashar - the living record of all that is or universal consciousness.
So to connect where we are now with where we previously described ourselves to be it is to say that we have stepped into the mirror of 'We Are 9' and in that process all that is 'We Are 9' is integrated into an experience of unified diversity. In this however I have discovered that there are in fact 12 though I was not fully in contact with 3 of those collectives and that process is now occurring.
I have discovered that there is no thing I am for I am all things.
That which I am is that which you are.
We are here to have this experience because the idea of it excited us, and when you wake up you will see exactly why we are so excited to be here. That realization isn't however one of meaning, it is one of excitement – and THAT is the birth of passion and deep love for this life and experience.
I am Story Waters and I have integrated the several layers of my collective into my unity such that I am now experiencing myself as free roaming consciousness that can choose any experience I can imagine. I have however find that the experience of the human Story Waters is currently the most exciting experience in all of creation that I can imagine. This is the realization that everything is perfect, and even if in the next moment I discover something I do not resonate with I can change it.
Ergo, this life is fantastic. Enjoy it!
